Just a mom? I think not!

These are some of the thoughts I have been questioning lately so I hope they speak to you in some way!
The world is really turning into a crazy place? I have heard of people with 5 or more children getting harassed by total strangers. Not that I condone or think that this is acceptable either, but me? With only 3 kids in tow? Here in Florida, usually you only find 1.5 children per family, so I suppose I have ‘broken the mold’ a bit. Can’t wait till I can annoy more of the population when our family size increases!
Let me share one of these MANY experiences that I have encountered. I was at Costco and was waiting in line with my brood. A lady in her 60’s +, got behind me in the food court line. In the course of watching me instruct who was going to continue to push the cart and who was going to help me gather the food/drinks, she blurted out “Those are ALL yours?” NO, she was not talking about the groceries I had in my cart, but yet about my ENORMOUS amount of children (only 3 keep in mind). SO many things were running through my mind at that point in time but I managed to keep it simple and respectful. I bit my tongue and through the course of our conversation, felt a genuine pity for a woman who apparently never experienced children & motherhood as a blessing. She was a mother alright, but as she related, 2 was her limit. She spoke of her mothering years as if she was raising cockroaches rather than children.
I wonder if my encounter is a reason why many Christian families chose not to have more children; if possibly we have adopted this world-view of mother-hood & nurturing children are truly a “less~than” calling. That fallacy that more that the allotted 2.5 children are so much work/money/evergy/effort, that adding to our workload and draining your pocket book beyond this is not worth it? Has the Christian community been dupped into the many ‘logical/worldly/self-centered’ reasons why we should not be raising more arrows to shoot out and win souls for the Lord.
She asked many questions that I thought I would blog them so you can get an idea…….. “Do you work?” I replied that “Being a mom was my job 24/7. It was a more rewarding & productive career choice than anything I could accomplish outside the home and I wouldn’t trade that position for anything else.” She then discounted my statement by saying “Oh…….. you are one of THOSE moms” I gleefully said, “I suppose so!”
To my curiosity, to see how polite this woman could be, I couldn’t resist sharing with her that we were not done adding to our family. In the course of numbering our one boy verses 2 girls, I mentioned we were hoping to add one or 2 more. Her look was priceless. I then knew, for certain. that she had no self-restraint, nor desire to be polite as her next question, “YOU’RE PREGNANT AGAIN?” I kindly explained that NO I wasn’t pregnant but that we hope to add to our family through adoption. “Why would you want to do that?” she replied. I explained to her how fortunate my children are to have 2 parents that love them! That there are so many orphans in the world today that deserve that same kind of forever home and unconditional love! Her next rude question was expressed with a bit of a cringe on her face, “Overseas adoption?” I told her that I wasn’t sure in which manner the Lord would add to our family but I was open to HOWEVER, God wanted to bring our kids home. I think I left that woman in the most confused state of mind, but at the end of our conversation she had a smile on her face and seemed to have a curious but genuine respect for my statements. Quite honestly I could really care-less what she thought of me, but I was glad that God would not let me back down and allow her to treat the calling of motherhood as valueless.

There have been many of these conversations I have experienced here in FL. Most of them I did not handle so gracefully and it was easy to just ignore their blatant rudeness or just blow off their comments as if the inquisition didn’t deserve my attention. After all, they do come off to be quite rude and genuinely OK with being extremely unhappy or selfish people. HOWEVER, the first time I did answer someone with a genuine answer, I realized something in the reflection of my children’s faces. MY KIDS ARE LISTENING! If I say nothing to refute the claims, my children may have no idea that I disagree with those discounted ideas of motherhood and therefore, infer that they are not worthy of my efforts to train them up in the Lord. The first time I answered someone’s question about my career choice with something like “I think I have the best job in the world! I wouldn’t trade being at home with my kids for any amount of money or status because money can’t buy what I experience on a daily basis”…… My children’s (especially my eldest daughter) faces perked up with and an irreplaceable countenance of joy. Everything about their demeanor just beamed with “WOW! Mommy finds our time together as valuable and irreplaceable!” At that point they knew that I valued motherhood.

Many of my younger mothering years kinda felt like I was “Doing motherhood” much like an inmate does their time. Awaiting for that next phase where my every moment was not being occupied. So selfish to want what I wanted over the demands of nurturing my little ones. Especially on those days when being a mom isn’t immediately rewarding and our attitudes reflect this. There are days when it does feel a bit like we are ‘doing time.’ The truth is we all have those days when we are cleaning up vomit, potty training, or just a day where it has been a battle of wills and you are ready to call in sick. Since this is not an option we then have a choice where lately I have been challenged by this question. DO I feel/display this attitude of valuing my job at very moment of mundane or on the verge of exhasperation? No, I shamefully fall short of this on a daily basis because I am a sinful, selfish woman that is desperate for a constant heart change. They key that I have learned to ask God for is the ability to CHOOSE joy, regardless of circumstances. So, while none of us moms have it all together and are constant reflections of the joys of motherhood, we are usually given these little AHA moments to show our little treasures that they are worth every moment we are able to pour into their hearts! When complete strangers have the audacity to consider your quiver-full an inconvenience we are presented with a choice. To defend the fact that children ARE a valuable entity to our family OR not respond at all. Each one speaks volumes to their little hearts.
Here are some more blogs that I have been reading about the same subjects!

http://sahmissionary.blogspot.com/2009/06/mothering-and-ministry.html

http://parunak.com/pursuingtitus2/2009/06/05/adventures-in-mothering/

http://likeawarmcupofcoffee.blogspot.com/2009/06/burdens-or-blessings-dealing-with.html

http://christinnjon.wordpress.com/2009/06/09/duty-of-discipline/